Sunday, June 5, 2011

6 Months

It goes without saying that time has flown. So far (luckily) this pregnancy has been a breeze. I am carrying an absolute angel. She has not created any insane cravings, side effects, outbursts (Tim is thankful for that one) and kicks me so sweetly instead of in the same damn spot all the time, if you know what I mean. Just the other day she began really stretching out and I could feel her toes. I did read an article about women noticing a correlation between their child's prenatal personality and their postnatal personality. All I can say is: I sure hope so.

Here is a recap of the past 6 months, in belly photos.

January: starting from zero, really.

February: I begin to sleep 14 hour days. I also have to eat something every 5 minutes to avoid nausea, which isn't too difficult considering I work from home. I lost my ass immediately mainly due to a halt in drinking and a shocking aversion to any kind of crap food. I remember Tim bringing home a Toblerone bar because he is a kind and thoughtful man and it sat there, uneaten for a solid six weeks until he took pity on it and ate it himself. I even picked it up and looked at it in amazement. I couldn't believe that it was still in the house and that I no desire to eat it.

March: We moved to the new place (it is glorious) and I moved into maternity pants. It was still freezing cold outside and no one could tell I was pregnant because what little bump I had was hidden under 5 layers of clothing. I have a history of being motion sick, so it would have been helpful during this time to have seats offered to me on the subway, which did not happen. This is the month where I get so sick on a bus that I have to weigh my options of where it would be best to leave my vomit. There is honestly no good place. The floor is easiest, but a purse is more discreet. BUT if you are able to think past the short term, you realize you will then be carrying around a bag full of vomit for the remainder of the day (possibly leaking) which will completely submerge the entire contents of your purse- objects that have been deemed 'necessary on a daily basis'. To make a long story short, the urgency subsided as soon as I got off the bus and everyone was spared.

April: Fiiiinally showing, in my opinion. Strangers still look at me and wonder if I am pregnant or have a tumor. I am beginning to sleep less and spend most of my time reading about all things baby related. The smallest choice or preference becomes an insurmountable decision requiring ages of research. Often I am too busy reading/researching to take a shower or go to the grocery store and have to complete these tasks minutes before Tim gets home from work so there is actually something tangible to say I did during the day. Every time I try to get focused on working I have to take a break to eat something. Life is complicated and I feel completely scattered.

May: This is the month where we find out that we are having a girl. Immediately I become a woman of sharp focus, time management, and informed decision making. I am cracking down on all the things that were up in the air with complete confidence. Cloth diapers? Ordered. Crib and changing table? Right one found and purchased on sale. Registry? Full of necessary items only, marked at the lowest price and with free shipping. Etsy shop? Reopened without a hitch. As my abdomen gets larger my actual stomach gets smaller and eating begins to resume recognizable patterns and demand less of my time and effort. I can finally go back to the gym and life as I used to know it begins again. Sometimes I feel so normal that I have to remind myself that I am pregnant. These reminders are not so subtle, as I have a darling moving inside of me and I also cannot see my feet. We decide on the name Alice Parker.

June: I begin to fit oddly in most clothing, maternity included. Everything is too short in the torso. Maternity swimsuits are a ridiculous joke- but as someone who has an extra 3" of torso on a non-pregnant day I am unsure why I am surprised. I outgrew one piece bathing suits in the 3rd grade, and I discover they still give me wedgies. I begin having to switch back to regular clothing and just get larger sizes. Dresses become shirts and maxi dresses are now my very best friend. My mentality is still functioning normally-though I am having bizarre dreams about Alice where I am bathing her at 8 months or so and we are having the most delightful time. Tim and I start our birthing classes and continue to set up Alice's future room (it is getting pretty damn cute in there). Alice's current room (ie: me) continues to blow my mind every time I look at it (often). I can feel her roll over and stretch. She begins kangaroo boxing like Sugar Ray Leonard, though gently, and I am impressed with her dexterity and speed. She stretches her long legs constantly and my belly is quite often shaped bizarrely. She is big enough now where I tell what position she is in, though once I confused her head with her butt- I am sure this will happen again ("what are you thinking with, Alice- your ass or your head?") in teenage years.

I can only imagine where it will go from here. I have started counting backward instead of forward which suddenly means she will be officially here in ~2.5 months. Holy crap this has gone quickly.

What feels like years ago.

Well hello!
What's that? You thought I was dead? I can see how you would think that. I was just in a pregnancy induced coma for a few months, but now that I am not sleeping 14 hours a day (hey, I was growing a new organ, plus a soon to be completely independent life form). I won't sport with your intelligence here by describing all the bizarre things I have been dreaming about, but I will give you a quick photo recap of our distract-the-midlife-crisis birthday trip to Hawaii for Tim's 40th.

A little bit alarming.

10.5 hours!

On Kauai, like, 1800 feet up or something.

On Tim's actual birthday, we kayaked and then hiked to a waterfall and went swimming. It was awesome. Which totally reminds me of the funniest part of our vacation. I can only describe this from my point of view, obviously which normally wouldn't be so drastically different from Tim's point of view. In this case however, there is a very large discrepancy between what I saw (ie: reality) and what Tim saw (who the hell knows).

We were hiking back from the waterfall to the kayak and passed some other tourists going to the waterfall. It was a guy and a girl, and he was taking her photo over by a stream. He saw us coming and since Tim was in the lead asked him if he would mind taking a photo. The girl was already over by the stream (the guy was already taking photos of her) and granted was wearing a brown shirt, which kind of blended in to the background. BUT, she was wearing a bright yellow skirt with her brown shirt which did not blend in at all. The guy hands Tim the camera and goes over to join his lady for a together photo. I assume (naturally) that Tim is taking photos of the two of them like a normal person. He is jokingly giving "them" direction and even says that he is going to take some close-up shots. As soon as he is finished with these close-up shots the couple says thanks and begins to move towards us to get their camera back. Apparently this is the moment when Tim realizes that there are 2 people he was supposed to be photographing, not just the guy. He looked at me with eyes as big as dinner plates and whispers, "....Oh my god, did you know that there was a girl over there too...?" Then, quick as lightning, he starts snapping photos of them again- though these images are just of her walking out of the shot. I begin laughing uncontrollably because I immediately see the pictures he had been taking in my mind. Close-ups of some dude with a random arm poking in the left side. I bet she wasn't in ANY of them! And she was, like a foot away from the guy in real life. And only 25 feet from us. I could not believe that he didn't see her until she began moving! The whole time. I can only imagine how weird they thought he was when they looked at the photos later and realized that Tim had all but cropped her out of them. Mr. Observant.

These were the other tourists.

All the pregnant ladies were in bikinis. I wonder why people try to sell the rest of us maternity suits. Trust me, they don't fit.

All the Iron in the sand.

Awesome canopy of trees.

Taro fields

And home again. To 12 more weeks of winter.